Ek Pathan Ki Murgi Beemar Ho Gai.






To Murghi K Theek Honey Par

Pathan Ne 1 Cow Zibah Kar K Sab Dosto Ki Dawat Ki. :-)

Ek Pathan 15 Saal Allah Se Ro Ro Kar Aulad K Liye Dua Mangta Raha.

1 Din Pathan K Paas Farishta Aaya or Bola.


Khan Tujhe Allah ka Waasta Hai,

Pehle Shadi To Kar Lay.

A Pathan Teacher Gives Dictation Test To Students:

Last Bench Students:

We Are Not Able to Hear You SIR,


Pathan: "Ok! I'll Write On The Board." :-)

Pathan: Nothing Ka Kya Matlab Hota Hai?


Teacher: Kuch Nahin.

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.

Pathan: Aisa Nahin ho Sakta,


Jab Word Banaya Hai to Kuch To Matlab Hoga He. :-)

Ek Pathan Ne Apny Chemistry K Professor Se

Aisa Sawal Pucha K Woh Sun Kar Pagal Hogaya.


Sawaal Tha:

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.
.

Sir! Naswar Ka Chemical Formula Kya Hai?

1 Pathan Exams Main Apne Friend ki Copy Kar Raha tha:

Examiner ne Pakar lia or usey Utha k Dosri Jaga Bitha Dia.

Pathan Writes at the End of Incomplete Question,

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.


Baqiya Hissa Roll no. 54234 k Paper Per Mulahiza Farmayen. :-)

3 Pathan ko Phansi Hone Lagi:

Pehle ko Phansi Lagai to Rassa Dheela Hone ki Wajah se wo Niche Paani Mai ja Gira,

Dosre ko Phaansi Di to Wo Bhi Paani Mai Ja Gira,

Jab Teesre ki Baari Aayi to Wo Jaldi Se Bola: "Bhai Ye Rassa Thek Karlo Mujhe Tairna Nahin Aata" :-)

Ek Aadmi Telescope se Aasman Dekh Raha Tha:

Ek Pathan Usy Dekh Raha Tha, Achanak 1 Taara Toota:

Pathan Zor Se Chillaya:


Wah! Kya Nishana Lagaya Hai. :-)

Teacher: Translate Into English:

"Yad-e-Mazi Azab Hai Ya RAB,
Chheen Le Mjhse Hafiza Mera."





Pathan:
"My Mind is Full of Data Base,
O God! Plz Make Me a Mental Case" :-)

Pathan: Aaj Hume Allah Yaad Aa Gaya.

Major Rohail: Wo Kese?

Pathan: Hamara Dukan Mai Jacket Wala Larka Aaya Aur Bola.

"Allah O Akbar"

Ek Rupe Ka Sawal Hai Baba.

Pathan Apne biwi k Saath Ja Raha Tha:


1 Larkay Ne Aankh Maari.


Pathan: Tujhe Sharam Nahi Aati Mujhe Aankh Martay Ho.

Larka: Maine Tujhe Nahi, Teri Biwi Ko Maari Hai.

Pathan: Sorry Yaar! Maine Tujhe Ghalat Samjha. :-)

Is Mulk ko Mulk Banaye Ga Pathan

Her Zulm k Khilaf Awaz Uthae Ga Pathan

Hai Waada Agar Saath Den Sub to

Chand pe Bhi NASWAR ki Dukaan Lagaye Ga Pathan. :-)

Doctor: Tumhari Sehat Bohat Kharab Hai,
Cigrrete-Noshi Chor Do.

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.

Pathan: Ye Nahi Ho Sakta Kyon k Cigarrete to Chor Donga.
Magar Noshi Meri Biwi Hai.

Teacher to Pathan: Translate "Khushi Se Mera Seena Phool Gaya."

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Pathan: Due to Happiness My Chest Became Breast. :-)

Pathan: Doctor Sahab 2 Saal Pehle Mujhe Bukhaar Tha

Dr: To Ab Kya Huwa?

Pathan: Yahan Se Guzra to Socha k Puch Lon K

Apne Nahane Ko Mana Kiya Tha,

Ab Naha Lun? :-)

Teacher to pathan
: Batao Pakistan ka Jhanda
Sab se Pehle Kahan Lehraya Gaya?


Pathan Boht Dair Sochne k Baad Bola:




Hawa Main. :-)

Ek Pathan Pe Bijli Ka Taar Gir Gaya:

Pathan Tarap Tarap k Marne He Wala Tha,

K


Usay Yaad Aaya

K

Bijli 2 Din Se Band Hai. :-)

Teacher to Pathan: 10 Fruits k Naam Batao?





Pathan:

5 Amrood
5 Aanar. :-)

Pathan India Gaya Wahan Barish Ho Rahi Thi:

Wo Mandir Mai Ja Kar Bhagwan Ko Bahir Phaink Kar Bola,

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.

"Kaddi Naa Wi Liya Kar Maama" :-)

Ek Pathan Ne Naya Underwear Liya:

Din Bhar Puray Gaaon Ko Dhoti Utha Utha Kar Dikhata Raha.

Sham ko Ghar Loata to Dekha.

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.

Underwear Ghar Mai Para Tha. :-)

1 Pathan Pilot Jahaz Land Karne Per Bohat Khush Hua:

Neeche Staff Ne Usey Hatho Hath Dhar Lia Aur Airman Uski Wardi Utarne Main Help Karne Laga.

Pathan Fakhar Se: Aaj Maine India K 2 Jahaz,
1 Aabdoz ko Mara Hai.

Airman: Lekin Sir G Aapne 1 Ghalti Kardi

Pathan: Wo kia?

Airman: Bus Aap Ghalti Se India Land Kar Gaye Hain. :-)

Pathan To Wife: Mera Yaar Aaya hai Chai to Bana Do.

Wife: Main Nahi Bana Rahi.

Pathan: Bana De, Jab Tera Yaar Aayega to Main Bhi Bana Donga. :-)

Sardar: Pata Hai Hamary Gaoon me Itni Sardi Parti Hai,
K Bhensain Jama hua dodh deti Hain.

Pathan: Hamary Gaaon Mai Is se B Ziada Sardi Parti Hai.

Ek dafa Mai Raat Ko So Raha Tha k Meri Aankh Khuli.
Maine Apni Charpai k Nechy Dekha.
Wahan Ek Ajeeb C Cheez Thi.
Maine Usay Aag Pe Garam Kya to Awaz Aai.

POOOON... :-)

Pathan Molvi Se: Namaz Sikha Do.

Molvi: SANA Aati Hai?

Pathan: Sana Nahi Aati, Uski Choti Sister Hina Aati Hai.

Meri Us Se Setting Hai. :-)

Sardar: Agar Naryal k Darakht Pe Charh Jaon,
To Kia Engineering College ki Larkiya Dikhen gi?




Pathan: Han! Aur Hath Chhor Dega,
To Medical College Ki Bhi Dikh Jayengi. :-)

Maa: Aaj School Se Itni Jaldi Kaise Aagaye?

Pathan: Machar Mara to Teacher Ne Chutti Dedi.

Maa: Aisa Kyon?

Pathan: Machar Teacher k Gaal Per Baitha Tha. :-)

Ek Pathan Ne New Car Li:

Aur Drive Pe Nikla.

Thora Aagay Gaya to Toll Plaza Aaya.

Aadmi Bola Han Khan G?


Pathan: Full Kar Do. :-)

Pathan: Yar Kal Abba Ne Bohat Mara.

2nd Pathan: Kyon?

1st Pathan: Kuch Nahi,

Main ne Bas Itna Poocha Tha,

"Kaminey" Film Dekhne Chalen. :-)

Boy: Maine Suna Hai K Is Ghar Main JIN BHOOT Rehtay Hain.


Pathan: Pata Nahi, Mujhe To Khud Maray Huye 8 Saal Ho Gaye Hain.



Moral: Pathano Ko Marne K Baad Bhi Aqal Nahi Aati. :-)

Afridi Ne Ball Ka Thread (Dhaga) Daant Se Kyon Kaata?

Guess?

?
?
?
?

Afridi Ne Ye Prove Kar Diya K.

Pakistan Main MOCHI(Cobbler) Ka Kaam Sirf Pathan Kar Sakta Hai. :-)

Ek Pathan Apne Ek Dost Ko Pani Mai Phenka,
To Wo Wapis Upar Nahi Aya

Dosre Ko Phenka,
Wo Bhi Nahi Aya

Tesre Ko Phenka
Wo Bhi Nahi Aya

To Pathan Ne Fesla Kia K

"Human Being Can Dissolve In Water"

Pathan at Shop: Bhai 1 Rupay ka Easyload Kardo.

Shopkeeper: Itna Load Karwa k Call Karni Hai ya SMS.


Pathan: Karna to Kuch Nahi,

Bus Aise He Paise Urrane Ki Aadat Hai. :-)

Pathan Ne M.A mai 1st Position Li:

Teacher ne pocha: Ab Agay Kya Karne Ka Irada Hai?

Pathan:

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.

Bachpan Se Shoq Tha
K
CHOWKIDARI Karon. :-)

Ab To Pathan Bhi Fakhar Se Kehne Lage FARAZ..!

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Khocha My Name Is Khan and I am Not a Terrorist. :-)

Foji Prade K Doran Officer Ne Pathan Sipaahi Se Pucha:
Ye Haath Main Kya Hai?

Gul Khan: Sir, Ye Bandooq Hai.

Officer: Ye Bandooq Nahi, Tumhari Jaan Ka Hissa Hai,
Tumhari Maa Hai Maa.

Then Officer To 2nd Pathan. Bandooq Ki Taraf Ishara Karte Huye:
Ye Kya Hai?

2nd Pathan: Sir, Ye Gul Khan Ki Maa Hai. :-)

Aaj Phir Ek Pathan Pit Gaya:

Pathan Shia Ki Majlis Mai Gaya,

Aur Wahan Dekha Sab Seenay Pe Haath Maar Rahy Hain.

Pathan Samajh Gaya Aur Zor Zor Se Haath Maar Kar Cheekha.

AAL IZ WELL.

AAL IZ WELL. :-)

1 Pathan k Ghar Mai Billi Rehti thi,
Woh Billi se Tang Aa kar Usay kahi Chhor Aaya.
Ghar Aaya to Bili Us Se Pehly Ponch Chuki Thi.

Pathan Bili ko Dobara Kahen Door Chor k Aaya,
Billi Phir Us Se Pehly Ghar Pohnch Gai.

Pathan ko Bohat Ghussa Aaya Is Baar Wo Billi ko Bohat hi Ziyada Door Chorny Gaya.
Wahan Se Usny Wife ko Phone Kya.

Pathan: Billi Ghar Pohanch Gai Ya Nahi?

Wife: Han Pohnch Gai Hai.

Pathan: Us Kamini Se Bol k Mujy Aaker Le Jaye,
Main Rasta Bhol Gaya Hon. :-)

Girl:
Mujhe Ek Aisa Husband Chahiay Jo Achi Achi Baten Kare.
Hansi Mazaaq Kare
Or Raton Ko Muje Songs Bhi Sunaye.


Pathan:
Baaji! Tum Husband Ko Maro Goli FM Radio Le Lo. :-)

Pathan Ghusse Mai: Shahrukh Khan ne Pathano ka Izzat Mitti Mai Mila Diya.

Dost: Woh Kaise?

Pathan: "Wo My Name Is Khan" Mai Pathan Ho Kar Bhi Larki Se Pyar Kiya :-)

Teacher: Tomorrow There will be a Lecture on Sun.

Everyone must attend it.

Pathan: No! I will Not be Able to Attend it.

Teacher: Why?

Pathan: My mother will not Allow Me to Go So Far.

Pathan Ne Apni Qaza Namaz Adaa Karny ki Socha

Namaz se Pehly Pathan Ne Onchi Awaz Mai Niyat Ki

2 Rakat Namaz Qaza Fajar
5 June 2009
5:20 Purana Time.
ALLAH O AKBAR

Pathan: Mai Office Janay se Pehly Apni Biwi ko Pappi Karta Hon.

Dost: Main Tere jany k Baad Teri Biwi ko Pappi Karta Hon.


Pathan: Ha Ha Ha.


Pehly to Main Karta Hon Na.

Interviewer to Pathan:
If a Parhata and Pizza is Dropped from a 50 feet building,
Which will Reach the Ground First?

Pathan: Pizza


Interviewer: Why?

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Pathan: Because it's a Fast Food. :-)

Ek Pathan Apni Maa ki Kameez aur Baap ki Dhoti
Pehan k Bazaar Mai Ghoom Raha Tha:

Ek Aadmi ne Pucha ye Konsa Style Hai?



Pathan: Mummy Daddy....

Masjid Main Elaan Ho Raha Tha.

Ek Bacha Mila Hai JIN KA HAI, Aa Kar Le Jaen.

To Ek Pathan Aaya Aur Kehne Laga.


Mujhe Bhi Dikha JIN ka Bacha Kaisa Hota Hai.

1 Pathan Apne Betay ki 6 Maah Bad Birthday Celebrate Kar Raha Tha.


1 Aadmi ne Pucha Khan Sahab: Log to Saal Pura Hone k Baad
Birthday Celebrate Karte Hain.


Pathan: Humare han Semester System Chalta Hai. :-)

Ek Kutta Pathan k Peeche Lag Gaya...


Pathan Ghusse main Bolta Hua Bhag Raha Tha:


Agar Tere Baap ka Hukumat

Na Nota to Hum Tujhe Batata. :-)

Pathan ko Us K Baap Ne Shadi k Mau'qay par Gun di Aur kaha:

Agar Teri B.V Kanwari hui to Ek hawai Fire Kerna,
Na hui to Usay Goli Maar Dena.

Pathan nay Pehli Raat Hawai Fire Kya Aur...

Doosri Raat B.V ko Goli Maar di.

Pathan: Ye 'Aaho' Kon Log Kehte Hain?

Punjabi: Ye Jahil Log Kehte Hain.

Pathan: Tum to Parhe Likhe ho Na?


Punjabi: "Aaho" :-)

My dear Jagjit, I am in a well here and hoping you are also in a well there.I'm writing this letter slowly, because I know you cannot read fast.

We don't live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen 20 miles from home, so we moved 20miles.

I won't be able to send the address as the last Sardar who stayed here took the house numbers with them for their new house so they would not have to change their address.

Hopefully by next week we will be able to take our earlier address plate here, and that our address will remain same too.

This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine, situated right above the toilet I'm not sure it works too well. Last week I put in 3 shirts, pulled the chain and haven't seen them since.

The weather here isn't too bad. It rained only twice last week. The First time it rained for 3 days and second time for 4 days.

The coat you wanted me to send you, your Aunt said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with all the metal buttons, so we cut them off and put them in the pocket.

Your father has another job. He has 500 men under him. He is cutting the grass at the cemetery.

Your sister had a baby this morning. I haven't found out whether it is a girl or a boy, so I don't know whether you are an Aunt or Uncle.

Your uncle, Jetinder fell in the nearby well. Some men tried to pull Him out, but he fought them off bravely and drowned. We cremated him and he burned for three days.

Your best friend, Balwinder, is no more. He died trying to fulfill his father's last wishes. His father had wished to be buried in the sea after he died. And your friend died while in the process of digging a grave for his father.

There isn't much more news this time. Nothing much has happened.

Love - Mom.

P.S. Jagjit, I was going to send you some money but by the time I realized, I had already sealed off this letter.